Wednesday, May 26, 2010

The Tale of The Epic Battle On The Raging River of Death and The Waterproof (sorta) iPhone.

So there I was....on the hooch in my roommates brand new kayak. We decided it was finally my turn to go down the hooch and reluctantly I went. Up to this point I have never soloed a kayak much less a canoe. So now you see where my reluctance comes from not to mention my sense of balance isn't the greatest either. I finally got in and decided "ok well it's now or never" as I paddled my way down the river not knowing what was ahead. The trip was nice and somewhat soothing. The scenery was nice and it was quiet, something I haven't heard in quite sometime. Once I started getting close to the end I realized that maybe this was not one of my better thought out plans. The rapids started getting white, the kayak harder to control, the sweat pouring. Then I realized the sweat was all the water that I was splashing around. Still the rapids where crazy, and I was bouncing off of rocks. Finally I made it through and thought "well that was not so bad". I was right that wasn't bad at all compared to what I was about to get into. I was on the last mile and a half getting ready to find my landing spot. Ahead I notice two routes, the left all white water and the right calm and smooth. Naturally I picked to go down on the right side which again not one of my more thought out plans. The speed picked up and I found a spot to land. The only problem was the tree jutting out from the bank was getting closer and closer, faster and faster. I tried to paddle to land just before the tree but my attempt was foiled. I hit the tree using my arm to prevent the tree causing the boat any damage which once was again not one of my better thought processes (I'm starting to see a pattern here). As I hit the tree, the kayak tipped over some and the water rushed in sinking the kayak and I started slid-ding down river. Between gasps of air and trying to catch the boat, paddle, my hat, and iPhone all from floating away, I realized this was a bad idea and why I don't get around water more often. I was able to get a grip on the rocks and step up throwing the items onto the bank. I look around and realize there are around 20 people spread out on the lawn of the leasing lodge and not a single one was looking at me or seemed any part interested in what was going on. My roommate saw me emerge from the water and came to see what was going on. I was soaking wet and still trying to realize what just happened. My phone was dead and arm scratched up, and the boat was salvaged. After collecting my thoughts and my things, it was then I decided this water stuff isn't really for me. We carried the boat back and I then started trying to figure out how to fix the phone. We started off by the phone in the bowl of rice trick leaving it to sit overnight. It helped soak up most of the water, but the damage was done. The master mechanic/engineer that is my roommate, took apart my phone and figured out my battery shorted out. We ordered a new battery in hopes that would fix the problem. After a day and a half of agony of no phone, the battery came in and he put it back together and to our surprise it worked! So the moral of the story is, a. dont carry your phone kayaking and b. don't kayak alone on your first trip. This has been another Tale from The Lone star Tavern, y'all drive safe now.

1 comment:

  1. I've only been kayaking once, in Monterey Bay, but I LOVED it. We only had issues with getting too close to the sea lions, which are big motherfuckers, and exiting the bay through fairly heavy surf. Nobody lost a phone (this was 1990!), but my roommate did lose a special necklace her dead sister had left her in her will. Sad, I tell ya.

    Anyway, glad your phone is working again, and maybe you should give the kayaking another try, just not alone and not with so much technogear with you! :D